Jobless, I was in the garage working on my bikes, having left my last profession as a travel and automotive writer in disgust after not being paid for my published works for over six months. A neighbourhood PCO ( private phone booths which were everywhere in the 90s and early 2000s)owner called, saying two men claiming to be from the newly built IIT Guwahati were looking for me. He added that they were very disrespectful and advised me to send them packing. The duo were from India's National Innovation Foundation, a government organization promoting grassroots innovators, looking for the "Bullet Innovator." If they seemed rude, it was because a school classmate gave them my reference, saying, "Just ask anyone in that locality for the bike mad fellow, they'll show you his house."
The PCO owner was apparently not amused.
They came to see my twin-spark plug Bullet, which I had converted in the mid-90s—about a decade before Bajaj Auto and years before Royal Enfield adopted the technology. Upon seeing the bike and hearing how the compression was raised, the clutch modified, and so on, they wanted to nominate me for an award. I flatly refused, saying Triumph had the first twin-spark bike racer way back in 1911, and Alfa Romeo had been using twin plugs in their cars since the 70s. "But you're the first in India," they argued and pursued the matter for some time, but I never relented, saying I would be an imposter.
Almost a decade later, quite by accident, I discovered that the same organizations published an e-book entitled "Assam Innovates" and yours is truly featured prominently in it, sporting a rock star hairdo, posing along with a dismantled motorbike. The text alongside is pure garbage as clearly those chaps, despite making copious notes, didn't know a thing about IC engines. Nonetheless, it elevated me from the level of a tinkerer, amateur mechanic, and "bike mad fellow" to the leagues of innovators.
Recently, I was invited to deliver a keynote address on Innovation, Sustainability, and Green Tech at the 8th NE Green Summit in Itanagar, the capital of the North-East Indian state of Arunachal Pradesh, which China also claims as its own. Instead of vomiting data copied from the internet or using cryptic, cliché terms preferred by climate and sustainability gurus and jhola wallas, I chose to delve into the meaning of these words and suggest technologies that can effect positive change in the North-Eastern region of India.
However, while attending the seminar, I immediately realized that I had just wasted three days of my life. I also drew several other conclusions:
1. No matter how noble the idea behind the event, none of the discussions matter unless policymakers and community leaders lend a patient ear to domain experts, innovators, and green tech entrepreneurs.
2. Cliché terms like "Net Zero" or "Carbon Neutrality" are empty words unless accompanied by definitive examples of technology, processes, and success stories backed by data.
3. Pickles and wine, no matter how good, and cane baskets, no matter how intricately woven, are not examples of Innovation, Sustainability, Green Tech, or the Circular Economy.
4. The fact that some money has been raised by brick-and-mortar businesses masquerading as startups is neither an indicator of their success nor a sign of a healthy ecosystem or genuine commitment to green tech or sustainability.
5. To the pundits from metropolises who love to "grace" such sessions as VIP guests, spouting drivel like "Oh, the North-East is the lungs of India," and telling us that we need to eat, sleep, and live in bamboo huts or become completely organic, I suggest they look around erstwhile lush hill stations like Shillong or Bomdila and decide what "cancer" has afflicted these lungs—or take a look at Sri Lanka and its organic experiment.
As for bamboo, my team and I design and build advanced bamboo biocomposite vessels like trimarans and catamarans, along with ultra-lightweight and low-cost fishing and rescue boats. However, none of the so-called deep-impact investors seem to have even a fleeting interest in our work when we mention it to them.
Lastly, judging by the photographs of me speaking at the event, I must admit that I seriously need to shed some weight.
I think that's the most attainable short-term sustainability goal I can strive for...
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