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Cherchez Le Femme

  The Russians love the French phrase “Cherchez la femme,” popularized by Hugo, implying that most trouble, directly or indirectly, is caused by women. Their women use it with equal fervor, because beneath the façade of female solidarity, they actually despise one another. In my case, those words should be embossed on my walls, mirrors, and coffee mugs. Most of the women I’ve met over the past 28 years have collectively inspired me to write a punk-rock version of Rod Stewart’s classic " Some Guys Have All the Luck ." Only my anthem would open with: “ Some dudes get blowjobs, others the whack jobs - no prizes for guessing where I belong… ” Misogyny? Sour grapes? Trapped by unwanted pregnancy and bamboozled by child support? Did the ex-wife take it all? False rape accusations? Nooo… sir. It’s far more insidious. I could, of course, rant for hours about a recurring theme with women in my life: “I rejected you earlier to sleep with or marry someone else, but now please feel sorry...